Siblings

So today I figured out that I will never live up to Noah's expectations of me. I try to be the best sister I can be but sometimes I would love to wring his neck. He starts things with Anthony and I have to end it. Either he touches Anthony and hurts him, or says something mean, and then Anthony gets upset and Noah doesn't care and I have to fix Anthony. 
And on days like this instead of hurting him, I'd like to just punch my door, which is hardwood. Yeah, that wouldn't work out very well. I'd end up with a broken hand and probably a huge hospital bill that my mom would be upset about. So yeah, we're not going to do anything to any children who are in a lower grade than me. But that doesn't say anything about boys who are my age or older. 
Hmm, Wisdom. He is my first real boyfriend and EVERYONE is making a huge deal out of it. I mean, you don't have anything that resembles a relationship and when you get something that could turn into one, everyone spazzes. Like 'omg, she has a friend who's a boy!' Dumb. Oh well, but that doesn't make me stop liking him any less. He's really nice.
So not on the topic of boys, but I had a meeting today and found out that I have 3 F's in school. I did not realize that... that means I can't be a part of the play.  But I have commitment issues and don't really care anymore.
And on another topic, my sister. I have a feeling she will be coming up a lot in the future, so I'll explain her now. Her name is Jazmen. She's 21. She is my half sister because we have different moms. Until she was 10, she lived with me. But then she moved. She never had the best life, but instead of breaking away from it all, she let it define her. For a while we were talking a lot and I thought we were getting really close. And one week we talked every day.  I was really excited. Until that Thursday. I found out that she moved 400 miles away, and didn't even bother telling me. And when I called her and asked her about it, she lied to me. 
I cried for days, and reconsidered how much I was loving people. I loved Jazmen with all my heart, and through all her boyfriends and screw ups, I stuck around and she only ended up breaking my heart. Great. So I've basically lost all my ambition to do anything, and i don't want to say it's her fault. It could also be the depression I suffer from, but I've decided to send her letters, as much as I see needed, and tell her everything she needs to know. It could be two letters or 200, but she needs to know how I feel. I realized only a little too late after I sent the first one, that she wasn't going to be responding, and changed my mindset to stop thinking about me and start thinking about her.
Too much sappy and not enough happy, I know, so until tomorrow....
Live long and love life my sparkly cupcake unicorns:)